Sunday Review ~ Respecting Autism: The Rebecca School DIR Casebook for Parents and Professionals

Respecting Autism: The Rebecca School DIR Casebook for Parents and Professionals
Written by Stanley I. Greenspan, MD and Gil Tippy, PsyD

ISBN: 978-0533164547
Vantage Press (November 2011)
Paperback 240 pages
also available on Kindle

Written by Stanley I. Greenspan, MD, "the world’s foremost authority on clinical work with infants and young children with developmental and emotional problems" and Gil Tippy, PsyD, a founder of The Rebecca School and its Clinical Director, Respecting Autism: The Rebecca School DIR Casebook for Parents and Professionals is a book that is essential for anyone wanting to understand the  Developmental, Individual-Difference, Relationship-Based (DIR) teaching model.  The DIR "methodology is based on the core belief that relationships are the foundation of learning."

In the introduction, Dr. Tippy explains why he has chosen to follow the DIR methodology as opposed to Applied Behavioral Analysis (ABA).  Dr. Tippy also provides a thorough description of each facet of the Developmental, Individual-Difference, Relationship-Based (DIR) teaching model.

The philosophy of the Rebecca School is based on respect. "At Rebecca School, building meaningful, respectful relationships is the foundation for learning. With collaboration between school, home and the community, the learning goes beyond the classroom."  I had the pleasure of touring the Rebecca School a few years ago.  And what I appreciated about the program was the emphasis on the child's strengths rather than their weaknesses.  The philosophy of the Rebecca School is evident through out the book and it is obvious that Dr. Tippy is personally invested in the students at the Rebecca School.   

Respecting Autism serves as a learning tool for both professionals and parents.  For professionals, it provides detailed insight into multiple Rebecca School student programs, Dr. Greenspan's recommendations and the program responses based on the Dr. Greenspan's recommendations.  And for parents, it provides what so many parents of children with autism need: hope and inspiration.

Regardless of what methodology you or your child's school follows, you can gain something from Respecting Autism.  While we follow more of an ABA approach, I now have a better understanding of the DIR model and can incorporate some of the methods into our day to day activities.     

Disclaimer: I was provided with a complimentary copy of this book, all opinions are my own.

AW Sunday Review: Pay Attention, Emily Brown

Pay Attention, Emily Brown!

Written by Linda Burton

Illustrated by Carl Burton 

 

ISBN: 978-1606130278

Woodbine House (October 7, 2011)

Hardcover 32 pages

Full-color illustrations
Ages 4-8  

$16.95

Just think, Emmy Brown, for a moment or two…
Suppose that I told you my toes had turned blue?
Suppose that I started to fly overhead?
Or spread candy and presents all over your bed?
If I hung upside down by an arm and a knee
do you think, Emmy Brown, you would listen to me?

If you are the parent of a child with autism or any other attention issues you will relate to little Emily Brown.  Emily Brown is a little girl who has difficulty focusing and her mother is trying desperately to get her attention.

It's beautifully illustrated pictures will be appeal to young children.  The illustrations are also perfect to engage conversation.


Some great questions to ask while reading is: 


What color is Emily's shirt?    
What is Emily doing?  


If your child is non-verbal, ask them to point to colors, shapes or objects.  And if your child is not able to point - use hand over hand to lead to help them.  

With its lighthearted and humorous language, Pay Attention Emily Brown!  will be enjoyed by both parent and child.  And the message of unconditional love and acceptance is reaffirming for special needs children. 

AW Sunday Review: The Girls Guide to Growing Up

The Girls Guide to Growing Up: 
Choices & Changes in the Tween Years 
by Terri Couwenhoven, M.S.


ISBN: 978-1-60613-026-1
Woodbine House, December 2011
Ages 8 - 14
62 pages
$16.95




"Puberty is a challenging time for all young adults.  Now girls with intellectual disabilities can grow up with confidence, benefiting from this very clear, practical and honest guide."
~ Dr. Brian Skotko (Physician, Down Syndrome Program, Children's Hospital Boston)

*

Last week I shared an article on my FB Page that made me giggle and cringe.  I won't say anymore.  You read it.  But I will say, I am really happy I have a few more years before I The Husband sits The Boy down for The Talk.  


But we can't put it off forever.  And neither can you.  Eventually our children will hit puberty and we will need to prepare them for it.   


And if I had a special needs daughter, The Girls' Guide to Growing Up written by Terri Couwenhoven, M.S., is the book I'd buy to prepare us both.  


Written in clear and simple language (3rd grade reading level) and paired with age-appropriate facts, realistic illustrations and photos, The Girls' Guide to Growing Up, explains in detail the many changes of a girls body.  The illustrations and photos are even presented in such a way that they may be created into a picture schedule.  The Girls' Guide to Growing Up also discusses feelings and discretion while emphasizing personal safety and privacy.  And it concludes with a Q&A to prompt conversation.


Terri Couwenhoven, M.S., is certified in Special Education by the AASECT and specializes in working with individuals with Intellectual Disabilities, their families and professional support. Couwenhoven is also a mom who gets it, her eldest daughter has down syndrome.  Terry Couwenhoven, M.S. writes with professional expertise and maternal sensitivity.  


Sound like something that would be useful for you?


Interested in winning a free copy?    


Leave a comment for a mandatory entry. 

For additional entries: 

1. Follow this blog; and/or

2. Follow me on twitter - @LaliQuin; and tweet me using #AutismWonderland hashtag and/ or

3. “Like” the AutismWonderland Facebook page.

With each additional entry you MUST post a comment. Comments will be numbered in the order they are listed and a random number generator (random.org) will be used to select the winner.  Giveaway is open to U.S. residents only.   

If you are already follow me or "Like" the page, no problem. Just post a comment and you have an additional entry.

This giveaway will end Saturday, January 21, 2012 at 11:59pm EST. Winner will be announced on Facebook & Twitter on  Sunday (by noon EST) January 22, 2012.  The winner will have 24 hours to reply. 

Feel free to contact me at autismwonderland@gmail.com with any questions.

Note: Woodbine House provided me with a complimentary copy of  The Girls' Guide to Growing Up  for review purposes only.  (I am offering The Girls' Guide to Growing Up as a giveaway) The opinions expressed are my own and have not been influenced in any way. 

Walking Up The Down Escalator

Summer 2011

Last night while doing homework with The Boy, I watched as he struggled coloring within the lines. Writing his name.  Tracing the letters.  His hand shook as he gripped the crayon.  The crayon that I broke in half to help with his grip.  (note to self: DO NOT break crayons in front of The Boy. It leads to 5 minutes of "We have to fix it.  We need scotch tape.") The Boy needed a bit of redirection and every so often I needed to put my hand over his.



Fall 2011



I stare at the scrawl of his six letter name and I'm glad he doesn't have to write out his last. As much as The Boy loves spelling and letters and building words with his blocks - writing is an exhausting task.  It's not laziness, it's hard.  Physically and mentally exhausting.  It requires hand strength he doesn't quite have. Motor planning and concentration.

For me it requires a lot of redirection.  And even more patience. 

Why does The Boy have difficulty concentrating to write his own name, but has the patience to spell out If you give a moose a muffin?  It's a question, I know he cannot answer.  At least not now. 

There was a time when The Boy couldn't point his finger. 
There was a time when The Boy couldn't jump.
There was a time when The Boy couldn't speak.

The Boy does all of these things now.  So I have to remind myself not to worry too much about his handwriting or the coloring within the lines.    

When I got off the D train at Columbus Circle this morning, I glanced over at the escalators.
The up escalator was too crowded, The down escalator, empty.  I was almost tempted to run up the down escalator, instead I ran up the subway steps.   

I don't know why, but at that moment I thought of The Boy and his learning process.  Some children can just get by as easily as standing on the escalator.  Others, have to work at it by running up the stairs.  Learning for The Boy, is like walking up the down escalator.  It's difficult, there are moments when you feel like you're just never moving forward. Getting to the top will take much longer, but it can be done. 

The Boy never stops moving.  Eventually he'll make it to the top.  And every day he's one step closer to getting there.        

The Potty Chronicles Continue...

This weekend we had a  MAJOR poop training breakthrough!

It happened on Saturday afternoon while I was doing my usual: laundry, cleaning and cooking.  The Boy was in his room watching television and playing.  The Husband tinkering with the computer.  I went to clean the bathroom and found The Boy's underpants on the floor.  

"That's strange."   

I lift up the toilet seat and discover a present had been left for me.  (Nice.)  I look back down at the underpants on the floor.  (Insert expletive here.) 

I walk into The Boy's room, he's happily jumping around, wearing his shorts.  I inhale deeply and quickly scan the area.  I cringe for a minute at a lump on the rug - whew, no - it's just a rubber turtle.  I grab The Boy by the wrist - I'm not touching hands until I've washed them.

In the bathroom, I remove The Boy's shorts and find the "evidence."  As I clean him up, I praise him for doing such a great job and I remind him that he needs to ask for help. 

"I can go to the bathroom, All By Myself."  The Boy tells me.  He says the last three words in his sing-songy voice.  It's really not one of the lines in the book.  The Boy sometimes incorporates spontaneous speech in his scripting. 

"Not quite, but you're getting there."  And I tickle him and he laughs.   

Every day, The Boy is taking baby steps to independence.  Today, he went to the bathroom on his own.  Took off his underpants and shorts.  And then put on his shorts (correctly!) all by himself.  The Boy is making progress.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

So, it seems as if I have a poop post for every season so far.

Winter (1/9/11) Poop Happens While Potty Training

Spring (3/29/11) Oh Poop!  

Eating In. Dining Out.

I read two interesting pieces this week regarding children and restaurants.  The first is that Denny's (in Maryland) is hosting an Autism Awareness Night on July 27th between 5 p.m. to 8 p.m.  For more information, click here. And the other article, non-autism/special needs related, was about one (upscale) restaurant was banning kids under 6. I like both ideas.  And it inspired me to write this. 
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


Over the 4th of July weekend, we took The Boy out for brunch with our good friends Matthew and John (aka Nino [The Boy's Godfather] & Uncle Johnny.)  We went to Peels; a trendy little place on Bowery.  Typically this isn't the kind of place we take The Boy.  But we were in the area, hungry and with two of our favorite people.  It wasn't part of our plan, we had no reinforcements.  No iPad, no Leapfrog, no books, no variety of toys to keep The Boy occupied.

Once again, The Boy surprised me.  We enjoyed our meal, had a few drinks (I had 3 - The Peels Punch, YUM!) and lingered in adult conversation for a few hours.  It was GREAT! The next day when I spoke to Matthew, he told me how impressed he was with The Boy.

 

Just because The Boy has autism, doesn't mean we live in a cave or that we shelter him from new experiences.  And we don't use autism as an excuse for "bad" behavior.    We want expect him to sit at a table and eat.  Clearly, we're not going to take him to Per Se anytime soon.  (okay, probably never considering it's about $150 per person.) And obviously we're not going out for dinner on a Friday or Saturday night at 8 p.m. But every once in a while, we like going out to eat and we haven't let autism get in the way. 

We are not the kind of family who eats dinner at the same time, seated around the table every night.  Between my work and school schedule, The Husband's work schedule and The Boy's therapy schedule - we just don't have that time.  (I wish we did.) During the week we all eat separately.  I often, stand at the kitchen counter, shoving food frantically in my mouth.  The Husband - usually the last to eat - eats while watching TV.  But The Boy, he always eats at the table.   

On the weekends, it's easier for us to eat as a family.  At times it's challenging since The Boy has a hard time sitting still (especially at home).  He likes to get up and run around at meal time.  But when he gets up, guess what?  I'm picking up the plate and taking it off the table.  After a few times, he gets the hint.  If he's really hungry, he'll sit and eat until he's finished.  If not, he'll let me know when he's ready. 

Going out to eat, we don't really have that option.  At first, I used to be scared of taking him out to restaurants.  OMG! What people will think?  (Could care less what people think now.) 

So we started at kid friendly places, like fast food joints or the neighborhood diner.  Places that were within walking distance, just in case.

We'd pack the necessary provisions: toys, books, the leapfrog (with a few games) etc.  We'd sit down and order.  Ordering would be done quickly. We'd let The Boy sit for a while, talking to him about where we were, asking him what he wanted to eat.   We'd wait before bringing out any toys.  Toys were always the last resort.   

When The Boy started to get antsy - usually right after we ordered - one of us would take him outside, walk him around the block and then bring him back.  By this time, the food was ready.  And if The Boy got antsy while eating, we'd start bring out toys.  Sometimes we had dessert, sometimes we didn't. 

We've upgraded to nicer places but still family style restaurants - like PF Changs or F & J Pine (a popular Italian place in The Bronx).  The Boy LOVES Chinese, so he's at his best behavior.  

Each time we go out, we increase our table sitting/eating time.  We ask The Boy what he wants and when it's time to order, we ask The Boy to tell the waiter what he wants to eat.  Usually I repeat the order.  We prompt The Boy to say 'please' and 'thank you.'  We include The Boy in the process.   

He's getting it.  Slowly but surely, The Boy is getting it.  And I think he is starting to enjoy it. 

Our meal at Peels (tee hee, that rhymes) was probably the nicest place we've taken The Boy to eat.  He was the only 5 year old in the place.  And it made me so proud, that we were able to take him there and he was able to sit through it like a little man.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Here are a few more articles that have suggestions for dining out 

http://www.time.com/time/health/article/0,8599,1653262,00.html

http://blog.autismspeaks.org/2011/05/31/dining-out-and-autism/   

http://www.flyinghighfarm.com/CTC_RestaurantwithAutism.pdf 

http://learning-difficulties.blogspot.com/2011/07/eat-out-even-with-autistic-child.html       

Stranger Danger & Autism

"When is a child ready to go it alone, anyway?"  That's the question James Barron poses in his July 13, 2011 article "7 Blocks to Walk, Brooklyn Boy Never Got Home."  And according to another report, the 8 year old boy, Lieby  Kletzky who was brutally murdered, may have had autism. 

I don't have an answer for James Barron.  And I don't know whether or not Lieby Kletzky had autism. 

But I do know, Lieby's death is every parents nightmare.  I know it's made me sick to my stomach ever since I heard the story yesterday morning.  I know my heart aches for this poor little boy and his family.  I know the tragedy has only emphasized the vulnerability of my own child.  And it's made me aware of all the mixed messages we have sent. 

Since the days of Early Intervention, we've prompted The Boy to "say hello" to whomever he meets.  I can't tell you how many times I've allowed him to walk off with therapists (strangers - men and women), his hand so willingly wrapping around theirs.  The Boy goes so easily, without looking back, without fear or any kind of apprehension.

Whenever we go out to crowded places, I place a name tag (with our phone numbers) around his neck and try to explain to him to ask for help if he gets lost.  But does he understand that concept?  Lost.  And in light of Lieby Kletzky story - who can The Boy trust to ask for help?        

I ask The Boy to say hello and praise him for "good talking."  How can I expect him not to talk to strangers?  How do I explain "stranger" as a concept?  And will he understand.     

How do you teach a child on the spectrum to distinguish strangers from people who may help, if there isn't a police officer around?

How do you keep your child safe when your child has no "safety awareness?"

I just found this book Social Story: Dealing with Bullies and Strangers and I will be ordering.  If you know of  any books or have suggestions, tips or tricks - please share.         

101 Ways to Say "Good Job"

Because sometimes, saying "Good Job" gets old.  

1. OK!
2. GREAT!
3. WOW!
4. FINE!
5. PERFECT!
6. EXCELLENT!
7. WONDERFUL!
8. OUTSTANDING!
9. FANTASTIC!
10. SUPERB!
11. TREMENDOUS!
12. MARVELOUS!
13. CLEAVER!
14. TERRIFIC!
15. GOOD WORK!
16. THAT’S IT!
17. Congratulations!
18. I knew you could do it.
19. That’s quite an improvement.
20. Not bad.
21. Good for you!
22. You make it look easy.
23. That’s the way!
24. Nice going.
25. Keep up the good work.
26. You just did it!
27. That’s better.
28. Way to go.
29. Much better!
30. Right on!
31. Keep it up!
32. You’re doing fine.
33. Keep on trying!
34. Good for you!
35. I like that.
36. Good going!
37. That’s really nice.
38. You’re right!
39. That’s great.
40. That’s it.
41. Way to go.
42. Well, look at you go!
43. That’s right!
44. That’s GOOD!
45. Now you’ve figured it out!
46. Now you have it.
47. You are learning fast.
48. That’s the best ever.
49. Good thinking!
50. You remembered.
51. You’re doing a good job.
52. That’s quite an improvement.
53. You really make my job fun.
54. That’s not half bad!
55. You haven’t missed a thing.
56. Nothing can stop you now!
57. That’s first class work.
58. You’re really going to town.
59. Now you have the hang of it.
60. Congratulations! You got it right.
61. Now that’s what I call a fine job!
62. You did that very well.
63. You must have been practicing!
64. You’re doing beautifully.
65. You’re really improving.
66. You’ve got that down pat!
67. You are really learning a lot.
68. I’m very proud of you.
69. You’ve got it made.
70. You are very good at that.
71. That’s coming along nicely.
72. I’m happy to see you working like that.
73. That’s the way to do it.
74. I’m proud of the way you worked today.
75. You’ve just about got it.
76. That’s the best you have ever done.
77. I knew you could do it.
78. You are doing that much better today.
79. Keep working on it, you’re getting better.
80. Couldn’t have done it better myself.
81. That’s the right way to do it.
82. One more time and you’ll have it.
83. You’re getting better every day.
84. You did it that time!
85. Now you’ve figured it out.
86. You’ve got your brain in gear today.
87. You’ve just about mastered that.
88. That’s better than ever.
89. Good remembering!
90. You did a lot of work today!
91. You certainly did well today.
92. You outdid yourself today.
93. I’ve never seen anyone do it better.
94. I think you’ve got it now.
95. You figured that out fast.
96. It’s a pleasure to teach when you work like that.
97. That makes me feel good.
98. You’re on the right track now!
99. That’s much better!
100. You’re really working hard today
101. Cool! 

The Story of My Feelings (video & lyrics by Laurie Berkner)

Just wanted to share the song "The Story of My Feelings" that The Boy sang at graduation a few weeks ago.  The book & lyrics are by Laurie Berkner. Since I couldn't find Laurie Berkner's video, I'm posting Rachel Rambach's cover.  Rachel is a board-certified music therapist and has a beautiful voice.  I think it's a great song to sing with our kids.  Check out her other videos on YouTube. 

This is the story of when I cry
When I'm feeling sad that's when I cry
And it makes me feel better
You know I feel better
After I cry
This is the story of when I laugh
When I'm feeling happy that's when I laugh
And it makes me feel better
It makes me feel better
You know I feel even better
After I laugh

This is the story of when I yell
When I'm feeling angry that's when I yell
And it makes me feel better
You know it makes better
You know it makes me feel better
After I yell

This is the story of when I sigh
When I'm feeling peaceful that's when I sigh
And it makes me feel better
It makes me feel better
You know I feel even better
After I sigh
And after I cry
And after I yell
And after I laugh
You know it makes me feel better

Stepping Up. Melting Down.

I will never forget walking into the Harry H. Gordon (HHG) school for the first time - it was mid June, 2008.  I had no idea what to expect of a special needs program.  We had just received the diagnosis three weeks before touring HHG. 

The Boy on his first day of school

At the time we toured the school, The Boy had no language, he couldn't point a finger.  By that September he had 5: hi, bye, no, baby, go.  He could also say letter A - E.  And he could sign: give me, more, finish and play.  I remember putting him on the short yellow bus for the first time that September.  So scared.  So uncertain.  Still doubting the reality of the diagnosis.  I remember The Husband saying, "It's just to help him catch up.  He'll be in a regular school by kindergarten."     

It's three years later.  And now it's time for him to move on.  He has more than 5 words - hundreds, maybe thousands.  He knows all of his letters.  He doesn't need to sign anymore.  While his speech is not always spontaneous, he can get his needs met.  But he's still not ready for "regular" kindergarten.  It's okay, we've kind of let go of that.   

Last Friday was his "Stepping Up" Ceremony.  The program said the kids would sing two songs: Sesame Street's "Sing" and Laurie Berkner's "The Story of my Feelings."  Before leaving the house, I stuffed tissues in my bag, thinking I would cry. But there was no time for tears. I watched as The Boy refused to come into the auditorium and had to be coaxed in by his teacher.  As I walked back to my seat on the other side of the auditorium, I could hear him crying as his classmates sang.

After a good 5 minutes of listening to The Boy cry, I got up and walked around to where he was. He was sitting in his teacher's lap, fingers in each ear and tears streaming down his face. There are moments when it's very easy to forget about The Boy's diagnosis. This was not one of the moments.  In that moment, the diagnosis was painfully obvious. And instead of celebrating and enjoying the moment, all I wanted was to get the ceremony over with and get him out of there.

For the millionth time, I questioned my decision for September.  Could The Boy handle being in a typical school?  Even if it is a special class for kids on the spectrum?  If a Stepping Up ceremony could trigger a serious melt down - what will he be like during an assembly?  What will the first day of school be like?

I wore a pretty dress.  The Husband was dressed up.  So was The Boy.  My parents also attended.  I wanted to take a nice family picture.  But by the time the ceremony ended, I was mentally exhausted and my stomach in knots, thinking about September.  We rushed through a few pictures.  Because even though The Boy stopped crying, he was not in the best of moods.  And when he says "it's time to go," I know it's time to go.

We decided to go out for an early dinner and as soon as The Husband started driving, The Boy began to sing "The Story of my Feelings."  It's a good feeling, hearing your child sing.  It's something he's been doing a lot lately.  Singing to himself, hitting all the notes.  The ceremony wasn't what I had expected it to be, but in its own way, it ended exactly the way I wanted it to. 

The Boy's time at HHG isn't over just yet.  There's still the summer program.  Thank goodness. 

                          

 

         

Best of the Best, Edition 7: Media and Kids with Special Needs

This month's Best of the Best Edition focuses on Media and Special Needs Kids and I'm proud to have my post - Managing Screen Time. Easier Said Than Done included. Once again, Danette Schott, founder of S-O-S Research, has collected over 25 posts from various writers.  The subtopics include: Advice for handling media, Positive Experiences with Media and Negative Experiences with Media.  It truly is a privilege to be included with such inspiring parents and writers.  I thank Danette for providing the platform for us to share our work and to learn from each other.   

http://sos-research-blog.com/06/best-of-the-best-edition-7-media-and-kids-with-special-needs/

  

And, in case you've missed it...previous BoB posts:

Anxiety and Stress (Edition 6)
Book Reviews (Edition 5)
Family Life (Edition 4)*
School Issues (Edition 3)
Social & Play Skills (Edition 2)
Autism and Treatment Options (Edition 1)*

*AutismWonderland not featured

Prepping for Vacation: AutismWonderland Goes to Walt Disney World (part 2)

June 2014 UPDATE: Visit Atypical Familia for

12 Tips for Autism Families Planning a Walt Disney World Vacation 

We have taken vacations before - both times with my parents and we drove to New Hampshire and Pennsylvania.  This vacation would be different.  We were taking a plane - a first for The Boy.  And we were going without my parents - a first for us.  And we were going to Walt Disney World - a first for me and The Boy.
    

Before The Boy, our vacation planning consisted of The Husband and I buying some airline tickets and packing our bags.  Having a child on the autism spectrum sort of changed the way we do things.  And a Walt Disney World vacation, especially with a child on the autism spectrum, requires a lot of preparation.  Winging it is not an option.  Ever.       



Pool at the Nickelodeon Hotel

Our planning started in March.  And it was a collective effort. First we sat down at the computer with The Boy and showed him websites to different hotels.  We asked him where he would like to stay.  We showed him various Disney hotels and then the Nickelodeon Hotel.  He chose the Nickelodeon - which made sense, he was more familiar with the characters. 
  

After the airline and hotel reservations were made and before I purchased the Disney park tickets, I picked up The Unofficial Guide to Walt Disney World with Kids 2011 and went through the entire book.  Tabbing pages, highlighting paragraphs, making notes.  This book is an amazing resource!  I would highly recommend it to anyone taking the trip to Disney.  The book noted height requirements, rated each ride by age group, duration of ride, when the best time to go and described each ride in detail (dark, scary, loud etc.) - for all four parks: The Magic Kingdom, Epcot, Disney Hollywood Studios and Animal Kingdom.       

    

Once we realized, that there were attractions in all four parks, we decided to purchase a 4 day park pass (next time around, we may do the 4 day park hopper - this allows guests to visit more than 1 park per day). 


The Husband also created customized maps on Disneyworld.disney.go.com - which were very helpful.  It made planning our days at the parks so much easier and there was no unnecessary walking around. (Good job Babe!)  I also asked The Boy's doctor to write a note.  Dr. Rodriguez wrote out a prescription:

Norrin is a patient in our practice.  He has Autism Spectrum Disorder and sensory integration difficulties.  Norrin may have difficulty waiting in long lines and the family would appreciate any accommodation that may be made during his stay at the parks. 

When we finally arrived at out first park - Epcot - at 9 am when it opened.  We headed straight to guest services office to request a disability pass.  The woman at the counter explained it was good at all four parks for the duration of our stay.  She also didn't ask for a note, but still I carried it with me everytime we left the hotel - just in case.

Anyway - so the disability pass could be used for attractions only.  Not for character meets.  (However, the pass does not guarantee immediate admission onto a ride.  There may be a few minutes to wait.)  We used the pass with discretion, making The Boy wait for some rides. It also gave him a chance to observe the ride and decide whether or not it was something he wanted to do.  I gave him about 20 minutes, that was the cut off.  Any wait longer than twenty minutes we showed the pass.  And we only went on the rides that The Boy agreed to get on.  If he said no, we respected his decision.

Ultimately, it was a family vacation and everyone - including The Boy - played a part in the planning process.  (Say that last part 10 times fast!)

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Tomorrow's post: The Boy's reaction to Walt Disney World and the Nickelodeon Hotel! And whether or not he wants to go back...   

Read more about our first vacation experience: Autism and Airplanes and Let the Memories Begin!

Prior to our trip, I also found the below blog posts and website extremely helpful: SOS Research Blog: Family Vacations - Taking Time Off From Special Needs, Hanabi Boy's Our First Family Vacation and All Ears.net - Tips for Autistic Children at Walt Disney World.

Kids Will Be Kids and Then There's Autism

When I was 5 years old, I bit a girl on the bus.  Let's say her name was Ann.  She was really shy and had droopy cheeks.  And one day on our way from school I leaned over and bit her cheek - hard.  The next day Ann's mother and two older brothers were at the bus waiting to confront me and tell my mother.  Ann's cheek was purple and blue.  My mother was furious.  I got smacked in the face right there on the corner of Britton and Gleane.  And much worse when my mother decided my punishment was to stay home with her.  The next day when I returned to school, my mother sent a note to my teacher - telling her what I did to poor little Ann.  And I was put in a corner with a dunce cap.  It was after all the late 70s, early 80s.

So in a way I get when people try to comfort me and say "kids will be kids"  or "all kids do that."  But usually there kid isn't like my kid.  And I wonder if corporal punishment and humiliation would work on The Boy.  Probably not.  Not that it's even a option.  I'm just saying...

The Boy is having a hard time lately.  5 SEITs since January.  We're currently waiting for SEIT #6.  Spring Break and going to the baby sitters.  The break in routine is starting to take its toll.  And he doesn't have the language or cognitive ability to articulate the frustration he may be feeling.  

Tonight I got home and checked The Boy's notebook.  Today he threw an object at a staff member's face.  When redirected, he urinated on himself - even though he's potty trained.  Earlier this week, he punched a classmate in the eye and he pushed another.  He never used to do these things.  These are behaviors that have increased since the disruption in home-bases services.  And I need to get him back on track.  But I don't know how.  

I'm worried about September, when he starts a new school.  What will that change bring?  Will the behaviors get worse?  And will we have the support to help him?

Yes.  All kids go through a stage where they hit, kick, throw and bite. Yes it's typical.  But when our kids do it - it's different.  Where is the line between behaviors associated with autism and age appropriate behavior?  Is there a line?  Or is it invisible like The Boy's disability.  Because I can't discuss it with The Boy.  He can't talk to me about what he's feeling.  I mean, I try.  But does he get it?  Is he listening?  Is he angry?  Sad?  Does he miss SEIT #1?  I don't know.   I ask him questions.  But he begins to stim and I get jargon or scripted speech in return.    

This is the feeling The Boy posted on his wall calendar: "Today I Feel Sad."  And if it's true, if that is how he's feeling.  I have no idea why.