#DearBlogalicious {My 600th Blog Post & #Blogalicious5 Recap}

When I first started blogging, I had no idea a community like Blogalicious existed. And after I met a few bloggers and learned about blog conferences, Blogalicious was a name that constantly came up. It seemed different from other blog conferences I heard about. The women that I knew, spoke about it with affection, they all had a story about their first time. And for many of them, Blogalicious seemed to be a turning point in their careers.

I'll be honest, while I wanted to attend Blogalicious, I had no intentions of making the trip to Atlanta. But when I was invited to speak on a panel on awareness blogging, I knew it was an opportunity I couldn't pass up. I had to make it happen. 

And I am so very glad I did. 

I don't attend many conferences. Working full-time (outside of the home as a legal secretary), blogging is my side gig and often takes a back seat to my other responsibilities. Attending conferences means taking vacation days, spending money and time away from my family. Attending a blog conference is difficult to justify. But Bloglacious was worth it. 

Usually I'm intimidated by conferences. The crowds, the brands, the pressure to network and practice my elevator pitch. But Blogalicious was different. I mean, yes there were brands and networking is always a must. But the vibe was so laid back. I felt the sense of sisterhood. And everyone was so genuine, I felt completely at ease.

While at Blogalicious, I spent time with Ananda Leeke and got a 15 minute coaching session. She gave me a game plan and set a time line for me to publish my book. For the first time in a long time, I was inspired to write. The plan feels like a real possibility.

  

I can go on and on about why I loved Blogalicious. But what I really want to say is thank you. 

Thank you for creating space for bloggers to come together - to reunite with old friends and to make new ones. Thank you for creating a place for us to learn and to be inspired.   

Thank you for being a one of a kind experience. Blogalicious is my fourth conference in the three years I've been blogging. With each conference I've attended, I learned something new. I've learned to value my writing and my work a little bit more. But what I learned at Blogalicous couldn't have been learned anywhere else.

At Hispanicize, Pierra Jolly taught me I needed to own it. At LATISM, I learned that my voice matters. 

At Blogalicious, I learned that I was worth the investment. I realized that I needed to start seeing myself the way others saw me. I realized that my dreams were within my reach, I just need to continue moving forward. I learned that I have the power to make it happen.   

Blogalicious used to be the conference that changed other bloggers lives, and now it's the one that has changed mine. 

I cannot wait to see you all next year!

  

from top to bottom, left to right 

(1) [@ the Gloria Estafan Concert for AARP] w Denisse Montalvan, Crystal Gudino, Vanessa Martinez Bell, Nicole Pressley, Monique Frausto, Maura Wall Hernandez, Jessie Nuez, Yoly Mason and Lorraine Ladish 

(2) Jessie Nuez & Monique Frausto

(3) Ananda Leeke  

(4) Jessie Nuez 

(5) Pierra Jolly 

(6) Ana Flores 

(7) Denisse Montalvan 

(8) Nicole Presley 

(9) Maribel Lara 

(10) The best damn donut I've ever had in my entire life. There's bacon on it. 

(11) Rhachelle Nicol, me, Christine Koh and Janee Darden

A Tale of Two Rings (The Lesson I Learned When I Lost My Wedding Ring)

We were married on a whim. The decision came to us on a plane en route to Dominica. “You want to?” he asked. “Sure!” I answered.

Without a plan or a care in the world, we made the arrangements to marry on our very first vacation together. We strolled through the market place in search of silver rings. 

We exchanged our vows in casual cloths by a waterfall in the courtyard of the hotel for all guests to see. 

When I returned to work as a newly married woman, I told one of my co-workers. Before congratulating me, she demanded to “see the ring.” I explained that it was unplanned and held up my hand with my silver ring that was too big.  

“Oh…well, congratulations,” she said. But I could tell that she thought I was cheated out of a princess cut diamond ring like the one on her finger. (She was divorced the following year.)

***

A year later on our 1st year anniversary, The Husband and I threw a wedding reception. The party was for our family. I just wanted the pretty dress. But even that day was low key. 

It was on that day - our 1 year wedding anniversary that we were supposed to exchange rings once again. The Husband picked them out, really. I wanted to go to the local jewelry store but he did his homework. He found this Japanese jewelry store in Soho. We picked out our rings and had them engraved. 

Mine: He won me over. 

His: She wore me down.

On the day of our anniversary party, we meant to exchange/renew our vows. But we got so caught up with family and friends and the dancing, eating and celebrating - we never did. At the end of the evening, when it was just us - we exchanged rings. No vows or words were said. Just our rings and a kiss. 

1 year wedding anniversary June 2004

***

As I sat on the floor of my hotel room, unpacking my suitcase and shaking out my clothes searching for my ring for the 20th time, I wondered: How could I lose my wedding ring? Where could it be? 

I searched the room and all of my bags. I checked under the beds and behind the toilet. I even took a cup and turned it upside down before looking one last time - it's an old wives tale someone shared with me. I asked the cleaning woman and reported it to the hotel. No ring.

I thought of The Husband, home with The Boy so that I could attend a blog conference. It's because of The Husband's commitment to me and our family, that allows me to do what I do. Without his support, I couldn't do it.

As I sat in the hotel lobby on Sunday morning with my suitcases packed, staring at my naked hand, I started to cry. I thought of my flight from New York to Atlanta - how with every bump of rough air I clasped my hands and looked at my ring. How could I get back on a plane to New York without it?  

Hours later, I walked out of LaGuardia airport and was greeted by The Husband and The Boy. Both were happy to see me. And I was happier to see them. 

By then The Husband knew I lost my ring and he was upset but he helped me put things in perspective. "That's not the ring I first put on your finger. The original ring means more to me."  

Both rings have a sentimental value to me for different reasons. When he offered to buy me a new ring, I refused. I don't want a new ring. I want my ring.

Later that afternoon, before heading out to lunch I slipped on the silver ring - my original wedding band and smiled. It's still too big and the ring guard annoys me but it's mine. I still wanted my other ring but I was grateful I had at least one. A ring is a ring - it means everything and yet ultimately it means nothing. 

Last June we celebrated ten years of marriage. It's been a decade of highs and lows. Our marriage is far from perfect. There are days we wear each other down and days we win each other over. We laugh, we love, we fight, we move on. 

A wedding ring is symbol of our commitment but it's not the thing that binds us and keeps us together. Our love does that.

    

{I'm Speaking at #Blogalicious5} Spreading a Message, Sharing a Mission: A Conversation About Awareness Blogging

For the last few years, I've heard great things about the Blogalicious Conference. And this year not only do I get to go, but I'm also speaking on a panel. I am so excited about this conference because it's an opportunity to connect with friends and to meet new bloggers.

I am especially excited to meet Maggie Mason (Mightygirl.com) - she's one of the Blogalicious All Star Keynote speakers. I just read her book, "No One Cares What You Had For Lunch: 100 Ideas For Your Blog" and am so inspired. If you love blogging like I do - you'll want a copy of her book.

I'm nervous about leaving The Boy for a few days - I haven't left him since LATISM12 where I got stranded in Texas. But I'm so excited to be going to Atlanta - I've never been. And I'm really eager to learn more about blogging, writing and building my brand.

Will YOU be at Blogalicious 5 - if so, I would love to say HI!

So...yeah, back to I'm speaking on a panel. Here's the info - hope you can make it :)

Spreading a Message, Sharing a Mission: 

A Conversation About Awareness Blogging

Friday, October 4 • 4:00pm - 5:00pm

Blogging about difficult topics or heavy issues carries a unique set of considerations and approaches. This panel of experienced bloggers and cause brand representatives will cover techniques on how to draw and keep an audience while covering weighty issues on your media platforms. Discussion will include: 

• The importance of tone and how you can vary it from post to post while still maintaining the seriousness of the issue; 
• The power and importance of an authentic voice as the creator of your content; Making your content and delivery different from others who cover the same subject; 
• Building awareness through networking on and off line; 
• Developing partnerships that fit your brand and can help spread your message; and
• Promoting your message on and off line.

For more panel information (including the other amazing female panel speakers): http://sched.co/143cdcz

To view full agenda: http://blogaliciousfive.sched.org